Today I started my day in Matthew. I woke up and reached over to pick up my Bible and I just started reading. I'll admit, I'm a little behind on the reading that I'm supposed to be doing as a challenge to myself - getting to know Jesus' life through the gospels. Yes, a lot of the stories are the same, and yes, they are repetative but there are so many differences of emotion between the 4 books. So anyhoo, I'm in Matthew...reading things that I have read before and I get to Matthew 13:44,45.
"The Kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field. When a man found it, he hid it again, and then in his joy he sold all he had ad bought that field. Again, he kingdom of heaven is like a merchant looking for fine pearls. When he found one of great value, he went away and sold everything he had and bought it."
I'm going to detour...but I promise this will all be relevant.
Later, I was counting the money I needed to deposit in my bank account from last month's earnings. I came across a lot more than I had anticipated, and in my initial excitement, I started thinking about all of the little things that I could buy because I could afford it. Then I felt guilty for thinking of myself and I had buyer's remorse before I even went shopping, so I started thinking of ways I could invest some extra money into someone who really needed it. Should I go buy a huge load of groceries and give them to a family who really needs it? Maybe. Should I donate this to the friends who I know are going on mission trips this summer, who still need funds? Maybe. Am I being over zealous about this and I should just save it? Eh... So I prayed, 'God show me someone who is in need today, who I can help, other than myself.'
"Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." Matthew 6:19-21
I thought of a friend who is constantly giving herself away to others, and rarely has time for herself. I'm sure there is something that she deserves, right God? Something she reeeaaally really wants but can't afford to buy...Or maybe something she needs that would make her life easier? So I sent her a text, out of curiosity, with intent to relieve her of her want/need and provide what ever it was that she wanted. When she answered me back, I literally fell to my knees and cried. She said, "The first thing I thought of was my sister's salvation."
Floored..............
I started thinking about how selfish and worldly I was, thinking of monetary pleasures that last but a fraction of a lifetime. I was ashamed of that fact that I was putting a price on contentment and happiness. I was brought to my knees by her selflessness, and the Godly love that I saw, and couldn't believe that of all things, someone else's spiritual needs were her preference, rather than her own.
I want to have a heart like that. A heart that serves, that thinks of others before myself; a heart that asks for things to better God's kingdom, rather than things that have a teensy little chance of bettering my own. I want a heart that believes and understands that God's kingdom is so much more valuable than anything else I could possibly think of, that I'd be willing to give everything I own in order to attain it.
Matthew 6: 1-4
Matthew 6: 24
Matthew 16: 25-28
Matthew 19: 21-24
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